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Dec. 1st, 2006 09:14 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jebbypalOh man, did I ever pass out last night. Still can't sleep flat without coughing, but they FINALLY turned off the heat so my body didn't pay any attention as it enjoyed sleeping at a normal room temp (plus, in relative quiet since I could shut the window! Oh, it's the little things).
Of course, they decide to turn off the heat for the last day of warm weather since it's supposed to go back down to 40 this weekend. *rolls eyes* Common sense, if only schools offered classes in it.
I did have a dream that someone in my lab had a lj. I blame this on the incessant radio announcer chatter about getting one of their assistants a myspace. Still, disturbing. Very disturbing.
I'm annoyed at mycheckfree, though I guess it's not my fault. Almost all the bills I pay through them are discontinuing the relationship. Weird. I liked it because it was just one password to remember and they have a pretty good guarantee thing about if any of your info is compromised. Oh well, I guess I'll keep using them for state farm. (Though this explains the problems I had with paying my cingular bill and getting it to register this month).
I can't believe it's december. Two months. Two months is all I have and for two weeks of that I'll be in OK. I'm not freaking out mostly because I have my brain in a relatively zen place right now where I don't look much beyond tomorrow. I think I've got all the post-writing binge fuzz knocked out of it -- I really wish I could get to the point where I could functionally do science and also write fiction at the same time. Unfortunately whenever I get muse dumps, I turn very Walter Mitty. During the actual muse dump, I'm literally telling the story to myself in words to try out how things sound whenever I'm not focusing on something. During the aftermath, I'm doing my best to watch the story as a show (or any other story) in an effort to recapture the word phase so I can write more without a struggle. Both of which leave me very ambivalent for engaging real life much. Or you know, mathematical calculations or hours of time staring at a plate doing repetitive pipetting. Which, if you wish to imitate this, take a piece of graph paper and set it on a desk. Then hold a pen that has a clicker on it in your fist with your thumb on the clicker. Click the pen down, touch it to a square on the graph paper for two seconds, pull up, unclick, repeat about 600 times and you'll have done what I do whenever I do one of my taqman runs. Fun, no? And that's without even trying to focus to make sure you grab the right tube to put the right sample in the right square.
In real life, no amount of science has the fun colors etc that you see on CSI or Bones. Worse, for most of science, none of what we do has remotely life and death consequeces. If you don't get immense satisfaction out of completely meaningless crossword puzzles, you probably won't enjoy research science. Which you know, when I was a sophomore in college, I KNEW! But then I took human anatomy and was bored out of my skull at memorizing things (plus sick with migraines every day from corn at the cafeteria, but I didn't know. I blamed the preserved kittys we were dissecting) so I decided I didn't want to do med school and took an internship in which I enjoyed teaching myself immunology. And convinced myself that well, immunology research would be fun. it wouldn't be boring as hell like the two summers I spent being a lab assistant in a genetics research lab. WRONG! WRONG! WRONG!
Which I guess there's only one thing I can say about my own wrong decisions compared with those of other members of my immediate and extended family. Only I was actually hurt to any extent by it. It's not illegal to hate what you do for a living. And I can do it without fear of accidentally killing anyone when I'm high....errrrrr...well, we'll ignore the mouse sacrifices to the lab gods, okay? :)
So all in all, things could be worse. I did get out of the midwest.....and find out that no matter where I live, I'm pretty much going to live the same way I did when I lived w/ my parents. Granted, I enjoy having more shopping options, more food options, etc, but well, in reality, one city is pretty much like all the others. Or even smaller ones to an extent. I'm never going to be the person who enjoys going to bars and getting blitzed with complete strangers and aquaintances (and hey, I did do it for a year and while occassionally fun, in reality it just made me miserable due to really stupid decisions made while drunker than hell. Plus, I'm freezing when I drink so walking around philly in snow while drunk is very very stupid). Finding like minded people is just as hard in a city of a million as it is in a town of 1000. I like trees, I like hills, but better, I like being able to afford a car to drive around and see those things in. I'd like to live away from construction noise if possible even if it means a commute. I want a golden retriever puppy like WHOAH. Kids I'm still ambivalent on....mostly because I know how much patience I lack as well as being somewhat concerned about what 2-2 1/2 years off of decongestants and allergy meds could do to me.
Oh man, how did this post turn into this?? Seriously, I was just going to write about how well I slept and then get my ass in to work to do the last bit to this repolarization experiment. Gaaah. And no, I didn't force myself out of bed to work out this morning. The biobrite alarm clock does wake me up (and without much jarring since the alarm is so freakishly quiet that I can't even believe it wakes me up), but it doesn't increase my will to actually get out of bed. Of course, I know, if I'd go to bed earlier than midnight so i could get the requisite eight hours that I know my body demands, that might be different.
But enough, off to work.
Of course, they decide to turn off the heat for the last day of warm weather since it's supposed to go back down to 40 this weekend. *rolls eyes* Common sense, if only schools offered classes in it.
I did have a dream that someone in my lab had a lj. I blame this on the incessant radio announcer chatter about getting one of their assistants a myspace. Still, disturbing. Very disturbing.
I'm annoyed at mycheckfree, though I guess it's not my fault. Almost all the bills I pay through them are discontinuing the relationship. Weird. I liked it because it was just one password to remember and they have a pretty good guarantee thing about if any of your info is compromised. Oh well, I guess I'll keep using them for state farm. (Though this explains the problems I had with paying my cingular bill and getting it to register this month).
I can't believe it's december. Two months. Two months is all I have and for two weeks of that I'll be in OK. I'm not freaking out mostly because I have my brain in a relatively zen place right now where I don't look much beyond tomorrow. I think I've got all the post-writing binge fuzz knocked out of it -- I really wish I could get to the point where I could functionally do science and also write fiction at the same time. Unfortunately whenever I get muse dumps, I turn very Walter Mitty. During the actual muse dump, I'm literally telling the story to myself in words to try out how things sound whenever I'm not focusing on something. During the aftermath, I'm doing my best to watch the story as a show (or any other story) in an effort to recapture the word phase so I can write more without a struggle. Both of which leave me very ambivalent for engaging real life much. Or you know, mathematical calculations or hours of time staring at a plate doing repetitive pipetting. Which, if you wish to imitate this, take a piece of graph paper and set it on a desk. Then hold a pen that has a clicker on it in your fist with your thumb on the clicker. Click the pen down, touch it to a square on the graph paper for two seconds, pull up, unclick, repeat about 600 times and you'll have done what I do whenever I do one of my taqman runs. Fun, no? And that's without even trying to focus to make sure you grab the right tube to put the right sample in the right square.
In real life, no amount of science has the fun colors etc that you see on CSI or Bones. Worse, for most of science, none of what we do has remotely life and death consequeces. If you don't get immense satisfaction out of completely meaningless crossword puzzles, you probably won't enjoy research science. Which you know, when I was a sophomore in college, I KNEW! But then I took human anatomy and was bored out of my skull at memorizing things (plus sick with migraines every day from corn at the cafeteria, but I didn't know. I blamed the preserved kittys we were dissecting) so I decided I didn't want to do med school and took an internship in which I enjoyed teaching myself immunology. And convinced myself that well, immunology research would be fun. it wouldn't be boring as hell like the two summers I spent being a lab assistant in a genetics research lab. WRONG! WRONG! WRONG!
Which I guess there's only one thing I can say about my own wrong decisions compared with those of other members of my immediate and extended family. Only I was actually hurt to any extent by it. It's not illegal to hate what you do for a living. And I can do it without fear of accidentally killing anyone when I'm high....errrrrr...well, we'll ignore the mouse sacrifices to the lab gods, okay? :)
So all in all, things could be worse. I did get out of the midwest.....and find out that no matter where I live, I'm pretty much going to live the same way I did when I lived w/ my parents. Granted, I enjoy having more shopping options, more food options, etc, but well, in reality, one city is pretty much like all the others. Or even smaller ones to an extent. I'm never going to be the person who enjoys going to bars and getting blitzed with complete strangers and aquaintances (and hey, I did do it for a year and while occassionally fun, in reality it just made me miserable due to really stupid decisions made while drunker than hell. Plus, I'm freezing when I drink so walking around philly in snow while drunk is very very stupid). Finding like minded people is just as hard in a city of a million as it is in a town of 1000. I like trees, I like hills, but better, I like being able to afford a car to drive around and see those things in. I'd like to live away from construction noise if possible even if it means a commute. I want a golden retriever puppy like WHOAH. Kids I'm still ambivalent on....mostly because I know how much patience I lack as well as being somewhat concerned about what 2-2 1/2 years off of decongestants and allergy meds could do to me.
Oh man, how did this post turn into this?? Seriously, I was just going to write about how well I slept and then get my ass in to work to do the last bit to this repolarization experiment. Gaaah. And no, I didn't force myself out of bed to work out this morning. The biobrite alarm clock does wake me up (and without much jarring since the alarm is so freakishly quiet that I can't even believe it wakes me up), but it doesn't increase my will to actually get out of bed. Of course, I know, if I'd go to bed earlier than midnight so i could get the requisite eight hours that I know my body demands, that might be different.
But enough, off to work.