*nods* - I've never had any kind of desire for kids. Which is not to say I'm anti-kids - I have a huge respect for people who decide to become parents because they want to become parents, and I'm happy to babysit for friends who've spawned, but I've just never shared the wish to reproduce or felt anything resembling maternal instinct in myself.
Luckily, my husband shares this lack of desire - it was one of the first things we talked about when we were looking at getting together. As for the needing to get married thing... we did decided to eventually (obviously ;-) - but it was all very non-traditional, with us writing not just our own vows, but our own ceremony, and it happened after we'd been living together for the better part of 5 years. I think for both of us, it would have been OK if we hadn't decided to have a formal ceremony - I'm not sure exactly why we decided to, other than that it seemed like the right thing at that point in our relationship (and we ended up having a 4 year engagement after we decided anyway, because we were living overseas and figured we wanted to wait till we were back in NZ to actually have the ceremony)
I like to think that if I hadn't met Gryphon, I would still have had a very successful, emotionally fulfilling life for the last 10 years - either as a single or with someone else. Then again, I have an intensely pragmatic (for the most part) view of relationships as contracts that are negotiated on an ongoing basis, whether they're acknowledged as such by the participants or not. Acknowledging it just gives you a lot more freedom to decide what is and isn't right in your specific relationship...
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Luckily, my husband shares this lack of desire - it was one of the first things we talked about when we were looking at getting together. As for the needing to get married thing... we did decided to eventually (obviously ;-) - but it was all very non-traditional, with us writing not just our own vows, but our own ceremony, and it happened after we'd been living together for the better part of 5 years. I think for both of us, it would have been OK if we hadn't decided to have a formal ceremony - I'm not sure exactly why we decided to, other than that it seemed like the right thing at that point in our relationship (and we ended up having a 4 year engagement after we decided anyway, because we were living overseas and figured we wanted to wait till we were back in NZ to actually have the ceremony)
I like to think that if I hadn't met Gryphon, I would still have had a very successful, emotionally fulfilling life for the last 10 years - either as a single or with someone else. Then again, I have an intensely pragmatic (for the most part) view of relationships as contracts that are negotiated on an ongoing basis, whether they're acknowledged as such by the participants or not. Acknowledging it just gives you a lot more freedom to decide what is and isn't right in your specific relationship...